This Isn't Happily Ever After
by innocents
Summary: SPOILERS FOR THE ONE. That fateful rebel attack right before the engagement changed the course of the entire story. What would have happened without it? Would anything be the same? Read on and find out!
1. Chapter 1

**The Selection Series is property of Kiera Cass, not myself.**

**I hope you guys will enjoy this! After finishing the series, I couldn't help but think about what would've happened if the series had ended differently, and how everyone's lives would be different. **

**I would love to get some feedback about the story, so please review and let me know what you thought, good or bad!**

**Follows and favorites are also appreciated. Thanks so much for reading!**

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Even now, just looking at his face brings me to tears. His neatly styled blond hair, his warm brown eyes, his brilliant smile - no matter what I do, I can't escape him.

It's not like his image is in short supply, after all. He's Illea's charming prince. And Kriss… the beloved princess. That part is even harder to think about. It hurts me to dwell on the idea for more than a moment, when I see a fleeting image of their smiling faces, pasted on the front page of a newspaper. I can't bring myself to watch the _Report_ anymore. My family has to come relay the information to me afterwards.

The reality of Dad's death is finally sinking in, too. When I find myself sobbing in my room, I can still imagine him comforting me, telling me how proud he is. The thought only makes me cry harder.

It's been nearly two months, and my family has begun to force me to leave my room. It can't be easy for them, having to take care of me while we all mourn for my father, but even the guilt of being a burden isn't enough to pull me from the depths of my sorrow.

Besides, we're much better off now. As threes, everything is easier to come by. There are leftovers and electricity every day. I'm glad that I did that much for my family; May and Gerad look so much happier. The knowledge that no one in my family will have to go hungry is enough to at least let me be guiltlessly miserable.

The hardest part is that I still love him. I love him even though he hates me. I love Maxon Schreave more than I've ever loved anyone, even Aspen, and I'm sure that this time I'll never recover from my broken heart. No amount of sympathy, no sum of money could ever fill this hole. I'm empty, like a conch shell, full of nothing but the whispers and memories of our love.

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My last day in the palace was most definitely the worst day of my life. It would have been so much easier if I hadn't loved him; surely, it still would have been sad, but it wouldn't have felt like my very being had been ripped out of my body to be trapped forever inside that beautiful cage.

From an outsider's point of view, it was amazing what my maids managed to do. My makeup made the puffiness of my eyes less noticeable. My hair was curled, falling in soft waves that framed my face. It wasn't the regal look of a queen, but I guess it was fitting – I wasn't going to be royalty.

My dress was deep blue, the skirt's shimmering fabric under a layer of tulle. The top of the dress was lace, elegant but still able to cover the scar from my bullet wound. The sweetheart neckline would have felt just right if I had my songbird necklace on; instead, the space there looked empty. I'd given everything I had in the hopes that I would be the princess, but nothing I could have given was enough. I had given Maxon my heart, and yet here I was, leaving the palace alone.

This was all my fault, of course. If I had just realized my feelings for Maxon sooner, if I had refused to acknowledge that I still had feelings for Asper… this could have been the best day of my life. I'd built our relationship on lies, and it was bound to fall apart eventually. My eyes started to water again. The hurt in his eyes haunted me whenever I closed my eyes. The scene played itself over and over in my head. My apologies were useless. All I had left were the love letters, the broken promise of our future together. _Yours forever._ He must have been hurting as much as I was. I guess it wasn't enough to make him forgive me.

The room was flawlessly decorated, clearly the work of Silvia. Everybody's murmurs and speculations filled the room. I could hear people who were confident I would be the princess. How would they react when Maxon proposed to Kriss? How would I react?

Sitting there, I couldn't help but hope that he would change his mind. I wished with all my heart that he would turn to me, his smile comfortingly familiar, and tell me that I was his. But when he spoke to me, there was no warmth. There was nothing but venom.

"I'd like my letters back. I don't know what I was thinking."

"I'll be glad when you're gone."

It's funny how in a room full of people, no one knows when you're falling apart.

After an eternity, the room was finally silenced so that the live broadcast could begin.

"Good morning, Illea!" Gavril greeted. "Today is the highly anticipated finale of the Selection. We'll all find out who Maxon has chosen to be the princess of Illea! Without further ado, Prince Maxon." Gavril stepped aside and the cameras focused on Maxon.

Rising from his seat to my left, he stepped forward. There was no podium, as that would prevent the cameras from getting a good shot of the proposal, but he projected his voice well. "This experience was life changing. I'd like to thank the families of all 35 ladies for allowing me the privilege of meeting their beautiful daughters, and the ladies themselves for being so kind to me. I've spoken with America and Kriss, and I regret that I'll be sending them one of them home today."

Did I hear his voice waver? Did that mean that he was telling the truth? He had just said that he wouldn't miss my presence.

"I won't drag this out any longer, as there will be time for a more proper speech later." I could feel the tension in the room as he turned around. His eyes caught mine, and I was desperately hoping once again that I would be his choice, despite it all. But then he focused on Kriss, and I thought I was going to throw up, or burst into tears, or perhaps both.

He got down on his knee and pulled a small box out of his pocket. He drew in a deep breath. "Kriss Ambers, will you marry me?"

The room immediately broke into applause; it was obvious what her answer would be. I could feel the tears leaking out now, but I held back the sobs. Kriss and I had promised that we would be happy for each other, no matter what the outcome was. I quickly wiped the tears away and realized that there was nothing left I could do, but try to start and accept my fate.

I wasn't Maxon's one and only.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hey everyone! I decided to change tenses after I finished writing this chapter, so sorry if there are some inconsistencies. It's very likely that I missed a few when I went back through to correct things.**

**Kiera is coming to my area next week and I'm super excited! All these characters are her property, of course.**

**Honestly, I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. I just don't like it. But I don't want to keep you all waiting, either, so here it is. :-)**

**Again, I would ****_love_**** for anyone reading this to leave a review. Follows and favorites also really put a smile on my face, so thank you to those who have done any of those things, and to those who will. c:**

**Do you all want me to respond to anonymous reviews? I'd like to at the end of each chapter, but having me talking both at the beginning and end of a chapter might feel a little off-putting to some readers. Let me know! I'm cool either way.**

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I pounded the keys of the piano. I'd been unable to find comfort in the melodies that were etched into my brain – instead, I'd taken to composing pieces myself. Nothing I'd learned from my life before the Selection fits or relaxed me the way it did before. There wasn't enough emotion behind them; all those pieces were nothing more than cute little tunes meant to stay in the background. When I was creating music, I found myself much calmer and happier.

I started to think that maybe, just _maybe_, I was getting over Maxon. At the same time, I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to truly let him go, or if I even wanted to do that. Although I didn't love Aspen the way I used to, it's not as if I didn't feel anything towards him. He still held a place in my heart, and Maxon did as well. Every day when I woke, I felt a little happier than the day before. _Perhaps letting the prince slip away is the best thing for me now_. I decided. _It lets me focus on my life _now.

But at the same time, missing him had become a constant in my life. Every time I saw something that reminded me of him, it made me feel like I hadn't lost him, not completely. I was afraid of a life where he would be nothing more than a memory.

I'd been given some more responsibilities, too. Everyone, myself included, decided that I needed to stay occupied, but I was still unsure about what field I planned to work in. Performance is the only career I'd ever known. So instead, I was put in charge of running all errands. Mom helped teach at the schools, and May liked to tag along. Kenna was busy raising Astrid, and of course Kota was no help. Gerad spent most of his time playing ball. Because we're threes, the idea of rising a caste and becoming a professional athlete isn't as absurd.

I poked my head into the nursery to let Kenna know that I'd be out before I left the house. It was refreshing to be outside, despite the recent rainy spell. Rain clouds hung perpetually in the sky, bathing everything in a pale gray light. I saw a few other people on the road, acknowledged their sympathetic smiles with a small nod.

I'd been approached by camera crews a few times, asking for footage to be played in follow-ups of all the contestants. I declined them all. I didn't want to live in some kind of in between – either I'd be princess, or I'd be just another three. How was I supposed to find closure if all people wanted to talk about was what hurt most?

I shook my head and focused on my feet, on the sound they made on paved road.

The open air market we bought most of our groceries from was bustling with people, like usual. The produce was usually fresh, and never too expensive. I was always able to buy a few extra to give to the hungry children I saw on the street. I never wanted to forget the life I had before the Selection.

We didn't need much, so I simply picked out a couple apples to take home. The air was humid, and thunder rumbled in the distance. I found the atmosphere of the market comforting, and wished that I had brought an umbrella. Instead, I hurried home.

I emptied the brown paper bag into the fruit bowl and picked up the stack of letters beside it. Most of them were addressed to my mom, but one had my name neatly printed on it instead. The envelope paper was heavier than the others, clearly of superior quality. I stared at my name and the sense of dread almost made me put it back down. What could be in here?

My curiosity won out, and I flipped it over to open it. It was held shut by the wax seal of the royal palace. Suddenly, I really wanted to see what's inside.

Tearing open the letter, I began to read.

_Miss America Singer;_

_Your presence has been requested by Prince Maxon Schreave. After careful deliberation, it has been decided that you would be a good fit for one of the royal family's plans for the future of Illea. You will be picked up promptly at 8 o'clock in the morning on March 4__th__. Further explanation will be given upon your arrival at the palace._

Maxon's signature has been printed on, but it was clear that was added just to make the letter more complete. Some secretary probably typed this all up.

I felt light-headed. Back to the palace? As by the request of Maxon? All the fantasies I had finally put to rest came springing back into my mind. Could this be a second chance? Even if it wasn't, I would still see him again. Speak to him, too.

I reread the brief message, and rushed over to the calendar tacked on the wall. March 4th. That was tomorrow! It seemed unlike the palace to give such short notice, but then, it's not as if I could decline. Or that I would want to. This time, however, I would have to put a little more effort into packing. I doubted that I'd have maids rushing around, making dresses just for me.

Did I need to pack? The letter hadn't specified how long I would be staying. _I should, just in case._ I decided. It'd be embarrassing to show up with nothing more than the hope of fixing my broken heart, expecting to be waited on like I had been during the Selection.

I rushed to my room to prepare.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi guys! I'm so sorry I haven't updated sooner. After meeting Kiera last Monday, I've been doing all sorts of things ****_besides_**** writing! I'm so sorry to keep you all waiting, so here's what I have written so far!**

**As always, characters belong to Kiera Cass. Please review, favorite, and follow! :)**

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I fidgeted nervously as I waited for the car to arrive. May had been the most excited when I announced that I would be returning to the palace. She had practically been on the floor, begging me to let her do my hair. I couldn't see any harm in that, and she had done a wonderful job. My hair had been curled and pinned into an up-do, which I loved.

The rest of my outfit felt just as official. May, of course, had helped me pick it out. The top portion of my dress was plain white with short sleeves, while the skirt, which began just above my waist, was tan, tied in front with a piece of orange ribbon. I didn't have it in me to put on a pair of heels, so I settled with my usual black flats instead.

It wasn't exactly a _royal_ look, but it made me feel like I was ready to handle whatever business I was to attend to.

I wished that more details about my task had been enclosed. Would I be sent as some kind of diplomat to New Asia? Would I helping Kriss overhaul the education system? I prayed that it wouldn't be the latter. We had promised each other to be happy for each other, but I wouldn't be able to handle working with her.

What if I was working on something with Maxon?

The thought made my heart skip a beat. I'm not sure if I could do that either.

As a matter of fact, anything dealing with Maxon left me unsure. It's not as if I could waltz into the palace and steal Kriss' fiancée, even if that was exactly what I wanted to do. The three of us would have to find a way to work things out face to face; I knew what cheating could do to a relationship. I refused to do that to Kriss.

Of course, this was all theoretical. I wasn't sure Maxon would even want me.

At last, the black car pulled up in front of our house. The driver stepped out of the vehicle and nodded politely at me. "Lady America. I'll be escorting you to the royal palace." He opened the door for me.

"I'll put this in the back." I said, referring to my suitcase.

"Oh no, allow me, please." He wheeled it away for me as I slid into the car. It smelled overwhelmingly of leather.

I waved at my family as they watched me pull away.

The flight and arrival in Angeles were uneventful. There weren't crowds with posters waiting for me, just Three's and Two's rushing around, trying to catch their own flights. It was startlingly different from the last time I had been here. I was ushered into another car with tinted windows, which quickly pulled away and headed towards the palace.

As the ride dragged on, I grew increasingly nervous. My mind couldn't stay away from wondering what my task would be, which would stray away into wondering about Maxon. I just wanted him to kiss me, to hear him say he loved me, to be his _dear_ for God's sake. I just wanted him.

I felt miserable by the time we arrived. When I entered, I was greeted by Silvia. She welcomed me and briefly explained that I'd be allowed the rest of the day to settle in, and that I would be briefed tomorrow morning, after breakfast.

I was then handed off to a maid who showed me to my room. As I pushed into the room, I was greeted by three familiar voices.

"Lady America!" Exclaimed Lucy, rushing forward to help me with my things. Anne and Mary were both beaming.

It was comforting that my maids from the Selection were my maids now, as well. They had helped me back then, and I knew I could trust them to help me now.

Still, it was a little awkward to be around Lucy. Aspen had told me that he had moved on, and of course she knew that I had dated Aspen. I had no reason to keep that a secret from them as I was leaving.

"I'm so glad to see you all." I smiled at them.

"We're glad to see you too, Lady America." Anne said, before Mary chimed in.

"We were excited when we found out that you would be coming to the palace at all, and then we were told that we would get to be your maids again! Maxon remembered, I quote, 'how found Lady America was of you three.'"

He remembered. Of course he did.

"We'd better unpack all of my things." I said, abruptly changing the subject.

"You brought clothes this time? You didn't have to! Of course we'll still be making you dresses." Anne seemed confused.

"They didn't tell me how long I would be staying," I admitted, "so I thought that it'd be the smartest move."

"From what I've heard, you'll be staying here for quite a while." Mary told me quietly.


End file.
